shit.. great way to start a post huh? yea.. that's how i feel almost everyday when i'm home lah. it's like i'm supposed to be revising and mugging for MYE and yet i'm procrastinating and basically slacking thru the whole day. procrastination is definitely a habit i can't or can never kick.

oh ya, in school sometimes, idk whether to be emo or not. haha. really weird. being emo is somewhat cool i think. sometimes ppl just wanna be left alone and think things thru you know. idk what things to think about lah but i do think of a lot of things when i'm emo. = p

hmm, today, went to republic poly for gamelan syf. just helped out a little bit to carry the instruments off the stage and... we got to miss a whole day of school. haha. but we also missed the part in school where xiaojing got really mad and started crying over her A math test result. should have seen it lah. yea.. lol. i better start on my hw now. but before that, i'll go eat my nasi lemak. = D

okayy..
yesterday, i was supposed to play soccer with the guys.
but, it was cancelled cuz there weren't enough ppl..
so, instead, i met up with myra, arif and syafiqah.
I didn't know why they wanted to meet up lah.
but when we did, I found out that we were going to this kenduri.. lol.
at the kenduri,,,,, I virtually felt like an outsider lah.
because, i hardly knew anyone there, except for myra's mom and baby sis.
yea. but nvm ah, at least I got to eat. haha.
after that, we went to a block under syafiqah's house.
for myra and syafiqah to practise their malay dance routine.
but mostly, we slacked there.
then, we decided to go to west mall.
just walked around. lol.
then, myra and arif had to go off.
but syafiqah and I continued walking around. -_-
then, walked back towards syafiqah's house but stopped somewhere.
we talked and crapped till 9. yea 9. lol. tak de kerje.
so after much talking, sent her home.
the end.. -_-

oh ya, my tagboard's dead. just so u know. haha.

Manage me I'm a mess
Turn a page, I'm a book
Half unread

I wanna be laughed at
Laughed with, just because

I wanna feel weightless
And that should be enough

Well I'm stuck in this fucking rut
Waiting on a second hand pick me up
And I'm over, getting older

If I could just find the time
Then I would never let another day go by
I'm over, getting old

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

Make believe that I impress
That every word
By design
Turns a head

I wanna feel reckless
I wanna live it up, just because

I wanna feel weightless
Cause that would be enough

If I could just find the time
Then I would never let another day go by
I'm over, getting old

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

This could be all that I've waited for
(Waited, I've waited for)
And this could be everything
I don't wanna dream anymore

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonnna be my year
And I've been going crazy
I'm stuck in here

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year(it's gonna be my year)
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere(go nowhere)
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear(everything I fear)
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here

fuyoh.. yesterday was a whole lot of fun.
had rehearsals before friday prayers..
after that was the actual event, Cultural Night.
there was a whole line of performances both by Bp and SMP Galur 1 students
i think we screwed up in the sing-along session lah. haha. nevertheless, we enjoyed ourselves.
actually, it was supposed to be only the boys singing but some girls joined us at the last second. lol.
Right after that, makan! haha.
Bp boys ate the stairs.. lol.
oh ya, i had to accompany a boy to the toilet. i think it was shahirah's adik.. agaknye je lah.
yea.. so after eating was the cleaning up.. stacked chairs brought things down etc. etc.
so off we went to the chalet.
cikgu senan brought us( syafiqah, hafiz, syafiq, asyur and I) there.
haha. it was funny when we couldn't find the chalet...
we got lost despite the fact that the chalet was like under our noses. lol.
so we waited for the others to arrive after we circled the chalet trying to find a way in...
but all the doors were locked -_-
so when we got in, hafiz, syafiq, asyur and I did our prayers. Cikgu Senan was the imam.
having him as and imam is a really good experience.
yea................. back to the chalet.
so we made drinks and barbecued satay
oh ya we ate dadeh as well.. is that how u spell it? lol.
so there we were at the table.
syafiqah, cikgu senan, aminah, asyur, syafiq, imran, hafiz and I talked about a whole lot of thing.
but mostly, we talked about the supernatural cuz syafiqah started it. haha...
oh ya, aminah was really scared and syafiqah kinda got irritated o_0
after much talking, cikgu fetched us home.
in the car,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, we talked about school and crushes. haha. it was hilarious lah.
so when cikgu dropped me off at my place, i forgot my bag.
good thing, the guys shouted, "BAG!"
haha. so i had to cross the road again.. to get it.
damn paiseh man. haha. so yea. while walking home, i laughed to myself when i thought about my silliness.. lol.
yup that's about all that happened yesterday.
and.. the SMP Galur 1 students flew back home this morning.
didn't go to the airport to see them off...
sedih...

P.S: i think i'm not used to blogging anymore. lol.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

forget it lah. not gonna happen.

woohoo! absent for the day. lol. went to the clinic with my mom. while waiting for my turn, I asked my mom a lot about our family affairs. from there, I found out that my mom is really really open-minded. ok. i actually didn't expect this. I asked my mom what if there is a chance that my wife and I( LOL. and I'm not even married yet ) can't have any children. try asking ur parents this. haha. the answer my mom gave was adoption. initially, i thought she would mind. then she added that if we don't have any children, then who is gonna take care of us when we're old and wrinkly. whoa.. haha. I think that was the first time that my mom and I actually talked seriously to each other. she even advised me on having a happy and everlasting marriage. oh ya. she also mentioned that parents shouldn't interfere in their daughter's or son's marriage. advising, that's welcomed. fuyoh. lol. I definitely appreciate her concern for my future. thnx mom! =D

yesterday, someone asked me

"do you think i should like someone who doesnt like me back but he still makes me happy?"

what do you think?

gah!!! i'm hating myself for getting the 3rd sergeant rank instead of the 2nd sergeant rank. from day 1, i wanted and dreamt of getting it. in the end i was utterly disappointed. when Sir Rio told the platoon to open up our envelopes, I was kinda reluctant cuz i didn't want to be disappointed. at the same time, i was hoping real hard that I got a 2nd sergeant rank. damn. I lost my spirit once i saw the 3 arrows pointing down. that's a 3rd sergeant rank btw. a 2nd sergeant rank has 3 arrows pointing down and 1 pointing up. I literally wanted to cry lah. seriously. but I held my tears back. didn't want to lose face. i was further demoralized when syabil who was in front of me and sherry who was on my right cheering and celebrating the fact that they received 2nd sergeant ranks.
great. if only i was in their shoes. if only..

sad sial!
sad seh!
sad right?

phrases I used when I found out many of my school platoonmates got 3rd sergeant. even the good ones that I expected to get the most wanted rank got 3rd sergeant instead.

i had mixed feelings when the sirs asked us to do cheers and stuff. i tried to hide my disappointment but sherry somehow saw through my pretense. gah!!! my seniors really expected a good turn out of 2nd sergeants from my platoon. at least 75%. unfortunately, only 4 out of 27 of us got the freaking rank. congrats to timonthy, zheng hong, yong kuang and razi. wow razi. u did us proud man winning 2 awards. he won best in trainfire and platoon best i think. yup.

yea.. that's about it. i feel better now. lol. i wanna be a pessimist from now on. great huh? that way i won't be that miserable if i fail or something. ingenious right? haha.

SO SWAY!

injured myself at Fico yesterday playing soccer with the guys and yet i'm still going for spec course. wow. semangat. haha. i'm currently typing with my left hand cuz my right hand's wrist is swollen. i have a feeling i'm gonna have a super hard time at the camp. shit. anyway, wish me luck. bye peeps. tengah tunggu subuh. lol.