Wednesday 30 September 2009



muahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha!
cute.. =D
hope she won't kill me.. *prays really really hard*

Saturday 26 September 2009

my cousin from my father's side came just now. she's happily married with two cute daughters. weird thing is i have no idea who she was. haha. sucks man. but good thing there was a good conversation between my family and her family. oh ya, they invited us to their house. i really hope my dad would agree on going as a family to visit them.

i think i should draw a family tree. so if any relative idk comes by, i'll just ask and refer to the family tree. haha. good idea right? lol.

60 Things About Guys That Girls Don't Know Of
"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.
Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.
Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.
Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.
Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're going for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method.
A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.
Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved.
Don't talk about your guy friends to your boyfriend.
Guys get jealous easily.
Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think.
Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.
Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.
Guys hate asking parents for money to buy girls presents. So they come up with ideas like saving their lunch money for a week. But it never works because guys are always hungry so they end up asking the parents for money anyway.
Girls are guys' weaknesses.
Guys are very open about themselves.
It's good to test a guy first before you trust him. But don't let him wait too long.
Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend.
If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.
A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.
Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.
Guys will brag about anything.
Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful.If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot.
No matter how much guys talk about asses and boobs, personality is key.
Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience.
Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped.
Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does, even if she doesn't notice it can make the guy think about it for hours, trying to figure out what it meant.
Guys seek for advice from girls not other guys. Because most guys think alike, so if one guy's confused, then we're all confused.
Any guy could write out a rulebook or advice book for flirting, but no guy can write out a book about relationships.
Try to be as straightforward as possible.
If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.
If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and is spazzing inside.
When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.
When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me."
Guys don't really have final decisions.
If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.
If your best guy friend seems to avoid you or is never around when you're with your boyfriend, he's probably jealous and likes you.
When a guy tells you that you are beautiful, don't say you aren't. It makes them want to stop telling you because they don't want you to disagree with them.
When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking something.
Guys like femininity not feebleness.
Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.
A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes.
Don't be a snob. Guys can be intimidated and give up easily.
Everything in moderation. Put on makeup, wear perfume. Just not too much.
Guys talk about girls more than girls talk about guys.
Guys hate rejection, but they hate being led on even more.
If you are going to reject a guy, just do it. Don't say they are like a brother or just good friends, it just hurts even more. Tell them that you aren't interested in a relationship and they will respect you.
Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them.
A guy would give his left nut to be able to read a girl's mind for a day.
No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.
Not all guys are assholes. Just because ONE is a jackass doesnt mean he represents ALL of us.
We don't like girls who are too skinny.
We love it when girls talk about their boobs.
Always make sure you know what kind of stuff your getting into before making out with a guy ...like whether it's a one time deal or not ...
Believe it or not shy guys are the most easiest to talk to..it may not seem right but trust me they will start opening up like books after you just ask them questions about their lives and unnoticeably tell them about yours...
When a guy hits your butt it means that he wants you sexually.
Even if they refuse it all guys are ticklish on the ribs.
Guys love neck rubs and if he lets you keep doing it ..it means that he really likes you or his neck really hurts...
Guys will test the waters to see how far they can get with you. Even if he doesn't intend to it will happen. Know how far it is you want to let him go and he will respect that...after you let him know a couple times.
When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible.


haha. found this in saved in my com. actually, some of the things up there are true luh. some aren't. so.... after reading this, i was itching to find out what guys don't know abt girls. hehe. so yea. after reading some of them on the net, i was inspired to become a better boyfriend for that someone. *raises eyebrows like the cadbury ad kids* lol.

anyway, had planned to study with her today. but it didnt happen. sadded. haha. nvm lah.. so yea. just stayed at home lor. except that i went out for a while just now to buy bandung. yummy. oh yea, my hair was on fire today as in hot. haha. cuz it was really spiky. simply hot. to me lah. dk what others would think. =P

i haven't done any revision today.. boo! not motivated lah.. just too lazy to do any. crazy right? haha. whatever.

erm, what else? i lost my guitar pick! damn. lol. ohoh! hazim's gonna help me replace my guitar strings and tune everything for me. hehe. thanks dude... by then, i can start playing again.

wanna see something random, funny and probably scary?? muahaha *evil laugh*
did this last night. have fun laughing or sorry if you'll get nightmares tonight. XD




Photobucket

Sunday 20 September 2009



wish i could play like her..
i started the day by going to the mosque for prayers. went alone. cycled there. the solemn occasion was really heartwarming. immediately after prayers before the khutbah, i wanted to go home. but i got held back cuz my slippers were covered with a mat which still had ppl sitting on it. haha. so i just listened to the khutbah as well lor.. initially, i thought i was gonna cycle home bare-footed. haha.

at home, i ate mum's hari raya cooking. hehe. deliciousooo! there was lontong, serunding, rendang, prawns, daging.. yummy. ate while watching TV. oh, i gotta say the sitcom in Sinar Lebaran this year is simply very amusing and hilarious. especially that Suhaimi Yusof. haha. he's a natural.

went to grandma's house.. i guess the whole experience was bittersweet.. one cuz i met not only my grandmother but i met my relatives. two cuz my dad wasnt there with us and i was pretty much clueless with who's who on my mother's side.

the thing is for the past many years i've been visiting my grandma every hari raya and every time for some unknown reason, my dad would be hesitant to join us. and every time it would be, eat, ask for forgiveness and go home immediately. i can tell without any doubt that my mum doesnt want to meet our relatives. amazingly, my mum wasnt successful this year.. i guess i cant blame my mum for wanting to. it's like there's a sense of embarrassment every single time my uncles and aunts ask, "Mane suaminye?"

until now, i'm pretty embarrassed when i go out during hari raya with only my mum and sis. no offence to my own mum but it's like she's a widow. seriously. even my sis said it.

besides feeling ashamed and such, i feel so empty. there's a like a void. even so, it feels so heavy. like a burden.. every single time, while walking, on the bus, anywhere.. if i see a complete family, i would just wish.. nvm.

so... even though it was a joyous occasion and all, i almost cried at one point of time and when everyone was leaving. the tears just flowed out. my sis cried too.. kinda felt empty again and disappointed with my dad. my uncle mentioned that even though we rarely meet, we're still family.. and yes, blood is thicker than water. i somehow felt some kind of closeness although i barely know them..

erm, right now.. i'm just trying to accept everything that Allah has laid out for me. i can't solely put the blame on my dad. i'll just pray the best for my dad. my family especially. i have to learn to be patient when handling things and not think too seriously abt things. anw, EOY is coming in 2 weeks..

RANDOM PART OF THE POST THAT PULLS ME OUT OF EMO MODE. haha.

Obek Osman's 5-year-old grandson has a PSP. and i don't even have one. haha.

Obek Osman's son, whose son is the cute bugger that has a PSP, has facebook and is gonna add me and my sis . haha.

Soki in boyan means rich.

Obek Osman live's with his 15-year-old son in JB. his wife passed away some time ago.

Obek Jamil has a grandson that, according to everyone else including him, looks like me. actually, i dont think so lah. haha.

according to Obek Osman, my mum was really shy when she was young. when someone would call out her name, she would run away really really fast. haha.

everyone thought i was the older sibling between me and my sis. -_- do i look that old? =( haha.

my cousin thought my sis was already working. she's still in sec 5 lah dey. and only 17. haha.

i think it's very rare to be tall in my family which includes my uncles blablaba cousins sedare-mare lah. according to Obek Jamil i am tall. everyone agreed. haha.

last but not least anyone know what kuih bidaran is? it's an old kuih.. my uncle has been asking his daughter-in-law, my mum and grandma abt it..

wokay.. that's all. Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri. Maaf zahir dan batin. forgive me for all my wrongdoings yea? May Allah bless you. =)


Wednesday 16 September 2009

whoa... rugby today was a blast man. though it was pretty violent, i enjoyed the game a hell lot. i think everybody did lah. oh. there was one time when i was the ball and zakir was charging at me. so... tick tick tick
BOOM!!!
I BANGED INTO ZAKIR. it was like i ran straight into a wall lah. so both of us fell down lah. but i think i hurt zakir. not the other way round. haha. sorry dude. luckily enough when i was on the ground on my butt, i managed to grab the ball and get a touchdown, the first for my team. yea! haha.

and... there was one point of time when i was tackling veingad i think, i i slipped and hit my head on the ground. instantly, i was clutching my head cuz the impact was great lah. amazingly though, the pain was short-lived and i slowly got up. then, i saw someone running with the ball. so i just asked for the ball and sprinted for a touchdown. yea! lol.

on monday, 3p1 soccer team played against 1C. trashing man.. 8-0 sia. furthermore we had a lot of shots. hehe.

last but not least, 2nd monthsary! though there were a whole lot of hurdles and challenges, we're still together. thankfully. oh! and you're going for galur! best news ever. haha. love you honey.

kay. gtg. bye peeps.


Sunday 13 September 2009


just felt like posting this.. it's been a long time since i posted a youtube video on my blog anyway. term 4 starts exactly 2mrw. ugh. and i haven't completed any hw yet. haha. random thought: idk why afiqah and shazwani refer to me as a geek. siao. lol.

3weeks to EOY
3days to 2 months

Thursday 10 September 2009

hmm.. basic jungle survival course. 3days 2nights. yup. that's it. i'm totally lagging in hw. sure die. lol. need to chiong on sunday. but i don't think i'll finish sastera. in fact i'm not sure if i would want to do it lah.

erm, for sure gonna miss her. here's the thing. i think i'm obsessed with her. haha. think of her too much liao. make me stressed and depressed only. even thought of printing one of our neoprints and bring it to the camp. lmao. maybe syafiq's right. oh ya. thanks afiqah and syafiq. i'm hoping i can keep her off my mind.

kay ah.. gtg. need to get to yio chu kang by 6 30am. idk whether that's even possible. bye.

Tuesday 8 September 2009

i'm such a sucky boyfriend.
most probably the worst you've ever had.

gawd, how i wish i could be the ideal boyfriend for you and won't create problems that.. that erm, idk, are lame? why are you even with me? i mean sometimes i just think i should break up with you cuz you really really really really really do deserve someone WAY better than me. but i just cant seem to do it lah. like i told you before, i would be damn sad if you were to leave me. wokay, maybe that's why i was depressed. i was thinking abt this.

i guess there are three things that make me a really sucky boyfriend. firstly, i find it hard to trust ppl. i guess i've had this for far too long that i can't even trust you wholeheartedly. there's just that tiny fraction of lack of confindence i have in you. believe me, i'm trying extremely hard to get rid of this feeling but i can't help but think you will surely leave me in future. this leads to me being highly pessimistic.

i've always hoped, from the start of our relationship, that it would last. but there's always a part of me that keeps telling me that it wont. no matter how much i tried to shake off this thought, it just keeps haunting me. invariably, making me depressed.

lastly, i'm not that confident in myself. i guess this is self-explanatory.

i'm starting to think all the small quarrels we've ever had are solely my fault. i just hope this feeling of hostility doesnt prolong.

i'm sorry i'm such a bad boyfriend to you.
i'm sorry i'm such a big distraction to you.
i'm sorry i'm so pathetic.
i'm sorry i'm so pessimistic.
i'm sorry i dont trust you wholeheartedly.

i know trust is a big issue in our relationship. but please, believe me at least. i'm trying my hardest to give you the trust that you've always longed for from me. i just need to change. give me time.

syafiqah, you mean the world to me. seriously. i just want you to be happy. always.
I love you. i really do.


Monday 7 September 2009

erm, i think i'll go play wolfteam or something to forget abt what just happened. cuz right now, i feel utterly dumb and silly.. the fact is, the matter was simply trivial and i didnt want to make a big fuss out of it by telling you. but i guess i already did by dwelling on it too much and making myself depressed and shit. i'm such a fucking drama queen. it's high time someone told me that.

honey i'm really sorry. i wish you could slap me as hard as possible right now.

Sunday 6 September 2009

woots!! I reached the Monster Wolf status twice in Wolf Team. for those who don't know, Wolf Team is an online game where 2 teams battle it out. A player can turn into a human or wolf anytime he or she wishes. When one kills an opponent player, he reaches the Baby wolf status, kills 2, Battle wolf, 3, Elite wolf, 4, Blood Wolf, 5, Monster Wolf. all these are achievable in only one life of a player.. SO YEAH! I REACHED MONSTER WOLF!! I guess it's all thanks to the new weapon i bought and the upgrade i had for the weapon to lessen the recoil..

ok. erm, why am I telling you this? doesn't even matter to you right? nvm. haha. i guess it's an achievement for me. oh ya, i managed to kill players that were of higher rank than me. i also killed opponent players more than dudes that were of higher rank. i'm a sergeant in Wolf Team. woots!!

whoa.. 1am already. wonder if i can wake up for sahur later. nvm continue blogging. haha. omg.

so on saturday, went for YMC. new flash: i've been attending YMC workshops though i'm not an official member since end of last year. haha. yeah. somehow felt like an illegal immigrant. good thing i approached one of the facilitators and told him abt my situation. so yay for me cuz i gave him my particulars already and hopefully i'll become an OFFICIAL MEMBER.

at yayasan mendaki, i met PERKAMPUNGAN BUDAYA DAN BAHASA ppl. akashah and nazihah. it was unexpected lah. akashah was in the same session as i was. when it ended and hazim, daniyal, fadzly and i was abt to exit the building, someone just had to shout, "RIDZWAN!"
haha. obviously, it was nazihah cuz she's that high. oh, her friends think i'm hot. woots!! hahahaha. two words. bad taste. haha. correct right? whateverlah. lol.

so yeah.. we discussed abt CSC. dk what that is though. but we're supposed to contribute to the society. my group, decided to have a performance-cum-fun raiser. the performance? nadim and malay dance.. will be needing the nadim crew and malay dancers from bp and anderson sec. so might have collaboration. but.... it's just a proposal though. not confirmed. hoping like crazy it will happen. =D

hmm.. what else? i met miqdad and cikgu senan in the mosque just now. haha. oh, on saturday night, my ex-ustaz let me join him and his wife when he hailed a taxi to go to the mosque. just now, he chauffeured me together with his wife and daughter to the mosque. thanks cik haji.

oh. army open house.. aiyah, won't really talk abt it lah. just post pictures.
erm, i guess i'll talk abt my beloved syafiqah? haha. ok wait.. maybe i shouldn't. my thoughts abt you tak teratur(arent organized). but i just hope u're doing okay..

wokay.. i should end the post already.. so long sia. haha. 1 44am. nice one. kay, i'll go take a nap now. lol. oh ya peeps, check out this songs..

zero gravity - david archuleta
automatic - tokio hotel
died in you eyes - kristina debarge

kay. dude. sleep already.. haha. good 'night' peeps.